Papa Bear went 4 for 4 and Our only friend showed his "Braun" by going OppoTaco as the Falcons edged out a victory over Direct Elevator on Tuesday evening, their fourth in a row.
With Don’t call me Dick nursing the worst injury the planet has ever seen, Goliath stuck on the world’s busiest highway, Tank wearing butt-less chaps and yelling “Yee HAW” out west, and Cashely still recovering from forgetting how to catch, the Falcons (16-7) were riding the Short Bench Express. Dougothy was grounded for only eating his cookies for lunch and trading his ham sandwich for heroin.
Direct manufactured two runs in the top of the first, and their defence was solid behind President Pitcher, downing the Falcons without a fight in the bottom half. After holding Direct scoreless in the top of the second, the teams traded runs over the next two half-innings before the Falcons finally broke out with four in the bottom of the third. It was about this time that Don’t call me Dick and his entourage of doctors, nurses, homeopaths and shamans arrived to cheer the team on. Unfortunately, due to the extensive regiment of pain killers and antibiotics that Don’t call me Dick was taking, his cheering quickly devolved into a series of grunts, moans and drooling.
The Falcon defence was showing more of that early season magic, holding Direct to no runs between the third and seventh innings, only allowing two in the top of the seventh while the offence added a two- and three-spot in the fifth and sixth respectively to hold on for the win.
Game Notes: Two wins away from free beer for the second time this season… Attendance was surprisingly high for a weeknight game, with lots of company for our only season ticket holder… A four-game winning streak is something to be proud of, but it’s a far cry from “N/A”… Mason, rocking the jammies-and-wellies combo… The over/under for the time it takes Iron Mike to comment on this recap under a pseudonym has been set at 8 minutes. Early indications are that EVERYONE is taking the under… BP has been scheduled for Friday at 7:00… Due to his impressive performance this year, Don't call me Dick has signed his first endorsement deal! Details to follow...
HR: Our only friend
RBI: Our only friend (4), Papa Bear (3), Senior, Dinner, Beardo
PIZZAS: Beardo (1/3), Fo’ Shizzle (1/3)
DOUBLE PLAYS: SLF-Our only friend
BATTERS FACED: 35
STADIUM: K2 Field at Maypo Yards
ATTENDANCE: 6 (30% FULL) - % is based on regular season capacity (Falcons' side only)
GAME TIME: 1:10
WEATHER: 19.3°C, Post-drizzly; Wind NW, 22 km/h (weather data courtesy Environment Canada)
After careful examination of Don't Call Me Dick's "worst injury the planet has ever seen", here's my suggested remedy (note the correlation to his requested nickname):
Posted by: Dr. Timmy
If we get Free Beer - it's going to be Blue Light right? Right? Everyone wants to enjoy six cold refreshing Blue Light's after six consecutive victories...
EVERYONE on the Falcons baseball team
Posted by: Everyone on the Falcons Squad