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assignment The Mattural Cycle
Friday 8:00PM May 11th, 2018
The Mattural, early run-away leader for Falcons MVP, hit for the cycle and cashed 8 more ducks in a 31-14 trouncing of VP Division rival Brew Crew on Friday night. The Mattural is now on pace for more than 218 RBI this season, which would obviously obliterate the current team record of 99 by Goliath in 2010. "I'm not going to get 190 RBI," said Matt, referencing his pace prior to this game. No, you're not going to get 190 RBI Matt. You're going to get 218.

Another slow start to the Falcons' offence in this game, the third in a row where the Falcons score 1 run or fewer in the first inning. The Mattural's selfish solo shot in the first tied the game, matching Phil's blast from the top of the first.

The Falcons defence held strong in the second, with Teets blowing two hitters away with 12 MPH fastballs to record strikeouts. A deuce for the Falcons in the second, plus 1 for Brew Crew in top of the third, and we had a tight pitchers' duel going for the lead in the VP Division.

Then the floodgates opened for the Falcons' offence. Highlighted by Band Camp's 3-run shot, the Falcons sent 15 men to the plate and scored 11. Brew Crew responded with 2 in the top of the fourth.

Sixteen more Falcons came up in the fourth, and 13 runs later the Falcons never looked back. Except when Brew Crew responded with a 10-run inning. Then they looked back.

Two Home Runs In One Inning Watch: The last time a Falcon hit two home runs in one inning was August 29, 2012.

Game Notes: The Mattural's cycle is the second in as many years for the Falcons... Hall-of-Famer Mike Murphy, the only attendee on Alumni night (where for art thou, Dinner?), reports this is the first Falcons victory on Alumni night since it's inception... Surf on over to the team roster page, new baseball cards have been added... Levi, three days after hitting 2 homers in one game, was fitted for the dreaded golden sombrero after this one... Bruce Banner, having seemingly finally settled on ONE bat, is thumbing his nose at the prospect of a sophomore slump. After knocking another 4 hits tonight, he's hitting .692!... Pikachu reports he's bought his own house, but the way he talks shows his true 15-year-old self: "My mom bought me some sweet macaroni and cheese pizza pockets!"

The Hot (Take) Corner: Car crashes due to distracted driving have been increasing and the common cause associated with the increase in smartphones. I should say that simpletons blame the increase on smartphones, because the ACTUAL reason for this seemingly perpetual increase is the demise of the manual transmission. Back when people cared about the connection between driver and machine, the manual transmission was how you equiped your car. Needing to drive with both hands leaves none to play around with your phone. Problem solved!

Automotive transmissions, Ranked:
1. 7-Speed manual (See: Corvette, 911)
2. 6-Speed manual (Mazda3, a real driver's car)
3. 5-speed manual
4. 4-speed manual
5. That weird Lamborghini manual transmission where you have to do the up-and-to-the-right for the 1-2 upshift
6. 3-speed (on-the-tree!) manual
7. Dual-clutch automated manual
8. Conventional torque-converter automatic (regardless of number of gears)
9. A horrific chainsaw mishap
10. CVT


2B: Pikachu, Stevie B, Poutine, SLF, Bruce Banner, The Mattural
3B: The Mattural, SLF
HR: The Mattural, Band Camp, Poutine
RBI: The Mattural (8), Band Camp (4), Pikachu (4), Poutine (3), SLF (3), Levi (2), Stevie B (2), Bruce Banner (2), Dr. J, Yeah Teets, Million Dollar Bill,
PIZZAS: Levi (3/3), Yeah Teets (1/3), Band Camp (1/3), Hobo (1/3)



ATTENDANCE: 6 (30% FULL) - % is based on regular season capacity (Falcons' side only)

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Team 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Final
The Brew Crew 1 0 1 2 10 0 0 14
Falcons 1 2 11 13 0 4 X 31
Tags: win, brew crew, cycle, the mattural, bruce banner, levi, pikachu
Posted on: Saturday May 12th, 2018 at 10:49AM