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assignment Rusty Falcons Pull One Out Of Their Butts
Monday 9:30PM July 5th, 2021
The rain held off, and two rusty teams opened the WMSPL season on Monday night with the Falcons coming away with a 20-18 walk-off win.

Game 1 of the doubleheader was rained out. Environment Canada’s thunderstorm warning was accurate (for once), and the teams waited it out in hopes that game 2 could proceed.

An eerily calm window opened around 8:30, and preparation began for the Falcons to FINALLY begin their 2019 WMSPL title defence.

Once the game started, it became glaringly obvious that these teams hadn’t played in forever. Fortunately, the only injuries were to the pitchers’ egos. For most of the game, it seemed the only pitches thrown were balls, or meatballs. In total, 11 free passes were issued, seven of which were by the Falcons hastily assembled pitching crew of Million Dollar Bill, The Mattural, and “rookie” Barry “Chequebook” Thompson. With Poutine in another city for another team in another league (which, all-of-a-sudden, doesn’t seem like such an egregious foul anymore), the Falcons quickly realized the value Teets brought to the team every day.

Broadway hit 3 home runs, including a mammoth grand slam in the sixth to take the lead, after Million Dollar Bill walked the bases loaded.

The Falcons hit two home runs of their own, or more accurately, 2019 Falcons MVP Grahambo hit two home runs. His first, in the top of the first inning with no one on base, brought calls to rename a Falcons solo dinger from a “Porter” to a “Duncan”.

After holding Broadway to a delicious doughnut in the top of the first inning, Grahambo’s first inning jack preceded Goliath’s rare-as-a-properly-cooked-steak FK, but The Mattural followed with a double, and was scored by a Miner Leaguer double of his own. The Falcons scored two to take the lead.

In the second, Broadway’s lead off homer halved the Falcons’ lead, but they couldn’t muster anything else. In the bottom half, the Falcon bats came alive. Single, single, walk, a Brett Bichette two-bagger, walk, single, walk, single, single, and the Falcons had run into the newly implemented 6-run-per-inning mercy rule. After two, the Falcons lead 8-1.

But it wasn’t time to start sucking each other’s popsicles just yet. There shall be no cupcake games in the WMSPL President’s division in 2021. Broadway chipped away with a singleton in the third, and after holding the Falcons to 4 singles and only one run in the bottom of the third, their bats arrived. Two doubles sandwiched the first out, and thanks to SLF completely forgetting how many outs there were, Broadway managed a rare-as-a-sober-Poutine two-run sacrifice fly. That sparked a hit parade, and Broadway finished the inning with the six-run max. Going into the bottom of the fourth, the game was tied at nine.

The Falcons had their second 6-run inning of the game in response, highlighted by Grahambo’s second dinger of the game, this one a two-run shot. The Falcons were up 15-9.

Back and forth went the score. Broadway scored four more in the fifth. Two for the Falcons in the bottom half. Broadway re-took the lead in the sixth, scoring 5 including the aforementioned grand slam.

Down 18-17 and staring down the clock as it approached the 85-minute WMSPL mandated time limit, the Falcons got down to business. Goliath and The Mattural started the inning with back-to-back singles. An SLF fielder’s choice wiped out Goliath at third. Chequebook’s double tied the game, and left runners on second and third. Million Dollar Bill’s two-run, walk-off (sort of) single gave the Falcons the victory.

Game notes: In the 2019 regular season finale, the Falcons also walked-off Broadway... Brett Bichette really knows how to prepare for a ball game. He arrived with three pizzas for his little one to snack on during the game!...


2B: Miner Leaguer (2), Cowboy, The Mattural, Brett Bichette, SLF, Chequebook
3B: None
HR: Grahambo (2)
RBI: Grahambo (3), Miner Leaguer (3), Million Dollar Bill (3), Brett Bichette (3), Chequebook (2), Goliath (2), Dance Dad, Mike, Cowboy, The Mattural



ATTENDANCE: 2 (10% FULL) - % is based on regular season capacity (Falcons' side only)

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Team 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Final
Broadway 1 1 1 6 4 5 X 18
Falcons 2 6 1 6 2 3 X 20
Tags: walks, bases on balls, free passes
Posted on: Tuesday July 6th, 2021 at 9:59AM